Tuesday, January 19, 2016


Forgive me if I've told this one here before...

Back in my days working a crappy job in Christian retail (books, music, tchotchkes, etc.), we would sometimes get people coming in just asking random questions about religion in general, Christianity specifically, and maybe something about a book or an object they had.  One day, a woman came in with a ring.

"I found this ring in the Target parking lot, and it has beautiful Hebrew writing on it.  I guess it must be something from the Bible, and I would just love to know what it says."  

The two seminary students on our staff who would have been able to read Hebrew were not in, but this guy Chris told her that we had a lot of jewelry with Hebrew writing on it.  Since much of it had one of a handful of Hebrew words or phrases engraved in, she should let us have a look, and we would have a go at figuring it out for her.  She handed the ring to him.

He looked at the ring, his eyes widened in immediate recognition, and he sucked his lips in--the way you do when you're trying not to laugh out loud or even crack a smile.  He nodded his head up and down slightly.

"Do you know what it says?  It is Hebrew, isn't it?" the lady asked wide-eyed.

Haltingly, "Yeah, uh...no...it's actually Elvish..."

One Ring to rule them all
One Ring to find them
One Ring to bring them all
And in the darkness bind them


  1. You mind if I use this for my novel? I have a character for whom this would be perfect.

  2. Oh that's the best thing I've read in a long time. Love it!

    1. Glad you liked it!

      Several of us staff were reading or rereading the books, and the movies were causing lots of excitement, so we were sort of at the height of that early 2000s burst of Tolkien mania. So, we were primed and ready for the big laugh she gave us! (We kept it in until she left). :)


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