Liz Lemon had the same bag-nemesis situation on this week's 30 Rock, which was killing the buzz of her recent return to optimistic, together Liz. As a counter to The Secret, she'd adopted a can-do action-oriented philosophy (No matter how much the gate is strait or who punishes the scrolls, I am the captain of my holes, or whatever). So, she went at the bag with hooks, saws, a trained squirrel, and trash talk: "I’m gonna hang you in my kitchen, and fill you with other bags! You will eat your family!”
Unlike Liz, I didn't get tazed or have to fight City Hall. I just went outside (late, under a cloak of darkness--I don't have Liz's chutzpah) with my long ninja pole-esque ice scraper and hacked at the bag until it came out. Yes! Small Victory.
I don't know if there's a lesson here...Life imitates art? Take action instead of relying on fad philosophies? I dunno. Anyway, the stupid freaking bag is gone.
I am the captain of my holes.